The first and second of twelve

I am beginning to think I shall end this blog...
but I won't,
until I have completed 'the kitchen' in a way that is fulfilling in my senior days!
I think that by then I will WILL be ready for a new life, and, hopefully, by then, in 2016, I will have developed a better sense of Thoughts, Needs, Hopes, Dreams, Regrets, AND moreover what I DO NEED to achieve before I can't.
This has been the red curtain hanging open upon my stage... it's still open and until the day I cannot BE, it isn't yet the final curtain.
I am trying hard to appreciate the difficulties that other persons experience.... and how it must be that HOPE is so hard to think about.
The glass is half or more full in my life despite whatever black dogs haunt me!
It is true that I've felt tired of blog posting, but not tired of being creative, if I can harness a positive stimulus. However, being human, I am proud that I can confront / express emotion without sweeping debris under the rug or into a box to put upon a shelf.  It is  better out than in.  I write for me and not for an audience! I write so that I can begin to understand LIFE as it is doled out ... or as I take whatever I take!

SO... an idea arose on my walk today: 45 minutes trailing The American Way leading to 'La Tranche Anglaise' with the final ascent then descent back to MY HOME. Oh yay, my home. Am I not fortunate to not yet be homeless!  Let's Step back one day to yesterday...

On the first day of Christmas LOVE brought to me:

• a cycle ride along a strait then walking long shallow ascents on the return (TOTAL time : an a hour and a half)
• a reindeer in a tree ( amusing )
• champagne and oysters...eaten in warm sunshine ... all we needed was the beach!  I provided a delicious Lanson Champagne... I am sold!!!
• delicious Christmas flavours, Anglais sur l'assiette.. which isn't what mine host envisaged. As I said to her later, we learn from Christmases we experience. Those who served were instructed to get the food portioned onto the plate before it lost heat! ... the plus side were the wines, the humour and that it was achieved in true French fashion ... eating over six hours with pleasant intervals when various people removed themselves from the table to return at the appropriate moment!  
• the fun and joy of children interacting with adults... 
  
  
  
  
  
  

  

  How delightful to see a 4 year old eating more than one!!!!

  

  The beautiful hand made tablecloth from Emmaus for less than ten euros!!!!! 

  
  

  
  

  

  At least 20 plates / dishes of different sizes  portraying Hummingbirds ? Colibris from Emmaus for ten euros!

  

  I do like a boy chicken!

  

  Whilst a modern pudding much like a steamed sultana pudding with a caramel type sauce was interesting I much prefer a real Christmas pud of home made quality but it has been some years since I have had the desire to make one!

and let us step forward to today:
On the second day of Christmas LOVE brought to me:

• a glorious warm spring-like day temperature about 15C!!!!!
• laziness feeling being content...
• a 45 minute walk to my friends' house to find out my holiday duties ...

Trees lopped or felled to provide logs for the owners of the land and to provide a clear view of the mill house!

Le Tranche Anglais - allez -up!

 Indeed - Allez ... up!!!!!!

Christmas 2015: Angles sur L’Anglin

MERRY CHRISTMAS 2015 as I've sent no cards or gifts this year. 

But I DO send a gift of LOVE, CARE, HOPE for better times! 

HOPE that Family and Friends relate kindly!

HOPE that displaced people find safety, warmth, shelter, food, purpose, income and an expression of their own talents, skills and intelligence.

Two Poems: Two birds: Five Photos: Two February months of a French Wintry World

Les Petits Oiseaux: SweetpeainFrance copyright December 2015

I have no photo of a blackbird, no poem of robin.

Yet on my roofs 'des petits oiseaux' stand and sing:

“Bon Noël”- we bring for you “une année heureuse,”

whilst Sweetpea sings Peace for Earth, Sky, Universe

Jewels for a Blackbird, returning summer and spring,

here is my poem to ring ding a ling.

Hope, Health, Happiness – All is Everything.

​Robin February 2015 copyright

Jewels for a Blackbird: SweetpeainFrance  copyright February 2012

Today I was singing and dancing 
as I stepped through the snowy hedged woodland 
where the angled branches of the trees criss-crossed each other 
as the patterns highlighted by white snow

rested on the tops of the lines of the branches. 

I had no camera. 

Today I was singing and dancing 
along the snow-packed lane feeling the joy of living 
to witness such regal majesty

of the wintry phenomena of frozen water 
and the prints imprinted of animals, humans, wheeled vehicles,

skis and toboggans; 
all had been there before me with tracks to places known and unknown. 

Today I was singing and dancing 
to let the bright light into my eyes and heart 
and let it make me tired and content.

Today I was singing and dancing

as blackbird hungrily ate the beautiful red jewelled pendants

hanging in a garden not far from the river.  

Jewels for a blackbird.  Will he sing and dance for me?

​The Chateau Angles sur L'Anglin: February 2015 

The End of the End of Year Message! 

Roof 1 Oiseau 1

Best wishes for 2016 

Roof 2 Oiseau 2

Violets

This week I am determined to do a morning and evening walk after having lived in almost closed orders!  The walks are very leisurely. Bimbling even! There is a little black and white pony in the field that was recently sold. The big GREAT DANE sort of dog seemed playful in his HUGE garden but I am glad he was behind wire fencing...although at one time I thought he was surely able to scale it!  Descending down the lane I came upon a beautiful heavy smell and stepped back to identify.. inhale the scent.. deep, melodious, heavy, fleetingly it escapes to return in the nostrils....

And as my mind made the connection with those sweet sugary drops that aunties used to have in their pocket, I saw their purple hue.... violet violets.  Later I spied yellow celandines.
Nice to speak French to a stranger and English to an American.
I am beginning to be less 'off the wall'. Is there any hope?
Postscript: 
But that was all written a week ago because I push postings forwards. The walks dd not materialise after the good start to the week when I concentrated all Monday, was proactive and clear several piles of "things to achieve"! OK there is more which has stacked up for quite a while... but I am tidying it!!!  After a Yoga morning where I had to use muscles `i did not know I had, I idled over copious quantities of tea with a gardener who will help me finish the courtyard project. The larch will go. Thanks Tim for your help on this disturbing decision. Then the GP, bank, Tours sadness,  IKEA visit to check out kitchens,  a car service and thank goodness the electrics on the remorque are repaired.   The bill was within my estimate. No electricity this morning bu then on my frequent search in the street for a helpful resident, the neighbour chez lui only for the weekend turned off all the trip switches until we found the culprit.  The steam from the kettle hits the cupboard above, then condenses to the wall prise. Depressed, I rallied to a bath and drove to a plant sale, where plants were 25% more than Leclerc yesterday or so listless one would not have wished to own them! Then I did a walk and now my head feels better!  The death of an expat has haunted me to keep things simple... but it seems he's left quite a lot of administrative headaches! At least I do have a UK will.

An evening sky boils

Falling asleep early evening after two glasses of Chardonnay, she raised her head to look west, grabbed a camera, rushed to the higher plain to overview the sky above the river, then cut down to the chateau by the back lanes but was too late to catch the magic.  There by the Chapel, several groups of people, obviously met in friendship, sharing relaxation and pleasure by the light and fire of a glorious setting sun.  Bird song trilled, smoke-laden smells of verdure filled the air between the stone walled maisons.  Spring arrives. She feels released from her prison. She wants it to last!  She has missed so much in her hibernation and recent illness, akin to being in a nunnery cell.  She has missed friendship and nature.

J.O.Y.

I have rushed to write.
The sun is shining... I spent thirty minutes in the sun, warming my face and heart, starting to read The Book Thief".  Then, gathered all the strength I could muster. to do what had to be done.
LONG STORY!...but...the mains drainage backed up into the garden.
I am cleaning a brick that has the word "SPECIAL" incised into one side...how silly and funny!... it's literally had a pile of poo on it, as have others.  This brick will have to take pride of place in my garden and not be hidden from view, to serve as a reminder of madness.  I am cleaning the area where a clematis struggles and maybe I shall plant a rose there!
HARK!
JOY mounts within my soul when I hear those cries.... those sounds I always associate with where I live and the passing of the seasons.  Les grues.  Apart from death there is one certainty, that whatever the shit in one's life, the seasons will come and go; they will bring forth LIFE and DESIRE to live. Spring will arrive to climb the ladder from recent despair and influenza.
Too late for the camera... but I heard them.  I opened the gates to Fort Knox, searched the sky from my street and there they were, towards the north / east flying, heading that way .. several v shape forms... SPRING AT LAST!!!!   I am in tears of JOY. They are JOY.
It's a long haul but I can get there., wherever I have to go! Death hasn't wanted me yet!!!!! I defy it! The last ten days or so have been absolute HELL and WILL (who is he?) has been more than rock bottom, battling with trying to keep me warm, stop me coughing, stop me crying, help me to sleep ...  I am not ashamed! Being ill needs a nurse, needs creature comforts, needs need to be pampered. It's hard!  I am human. Dramatic? Maybe but I don't care. I am who I am! 
SPRING SUNSHINE... LET ME HAVE IT! Let it shine into my house.  I need someone to instal a velux or sun tunnel.

What will the days of the blackbird bring?

‘giorni della merla’ (days of the blackbird).

with thanks to rspb for image

Yesterday, my guest informed me of this story!
In Italy,  the days of the blackbird or 'i giorni della merla' are traditionally the coldest days of the year...29, 30, 31 January, sometimes including February 1st.  Folk-lore says that the colder those days the better Spring weather there will be!  Fascinating to learn something new, if true!
Here are three links for you to read if interested!

‘giorni della merla’ (days of the blackbird).

‘giorni della merla’ (days of the blackbird).

‘giorni della merla’ (days of the blackbird).

‘giorni della merla’ (days of the blackbird).

‘giorni della merla’ (days of the blackbird).

 http://www.italyheritage.com/traditions/january/29-30-31-merla-days.htm

 http://www.italymagazine.com/featured-story/days-blackbird-when-italy-coldest

‘giorni della merla’ (days of the blackbird).

 http://www.swide.com/art-culture/giorni-della-merla-history-of-the-italian-legend-of-the-three-days-of-the-blackbird/2015/01/29

Hope

Pretty white bells nod sheepishly
as they raise their heads in January
blooming amidst ground ivy
glistening gems of purity.
Sheltered in the grassy glade
pointing leafy sword-like blades
treasures on a dry stone wall
full of Heavenly Hope.
Snow has not yet fallen
when flowery drops appear
promising nature's glory
for the coming future year.

Hellebore

I think these are Stinking Hellebore! Two different plants - two pics - but they seem to have different leaf structure.... one has fat leaves, the other thin...

Just appearing in local French woodlands - quite common in the village river valley.

Food and too much of it!

For a dinner party of 4 adults and three children aged six and three, I could not get Bar which is Sea Bass.  However, a 2kg Norwegian trout was purchased at Intermarche, where the fishmonger explained how to cook it.  She descaled and prepped it.  In future I would ask her to take out the skeleton.  She had suggested that she could!  I would keep the skeleton for stock and stuff the fillets as I did for the whole fish... that way I would not have tricky bones and waste! After the dinner party, I froze some of the flesh as i got tired of eating trout for four days!   I made the debris into fish stock and used some of that as a basis for pea soup!  The rest of the fish stock has been frozen for winter soup!
We were supposed to start with oysters but my friends didn't go to the village and let me know.. Instead they brought smoked salmon on crackers with gravadlax for the aperos.  Nice!  AND they bought bubbly which I had already got but we opened theirs.  I hope I will take mine round to their house.
Then we had slices of finger thick, smoked salmon from a side fillet that I had bought a few weeks ago served with a green salad (rocket, avocado, shallots ( I wanted spring onions!) and asparagus.  I warmed up the salmon so it was cooked and very rich! The photo was blurred so got deleted!
NB That evening I realised the trout was not a good idea because it was almost like Salmon! T
For the main course the trout was served with small roasted potatoes which had been partially cooked in the kettle with the trout, plus grated celeriac and carrot which I had braised in lemon juice, zest and cream in the oven plus green shoots of Romanesco.
We were full. Parents were tired so the lovely Valençay and Gorgonzola cheeses remained untouched.   They chose the home made lemon curd dessert which was layered with crushed speculoos biscuits and plain yoghurt in individual glasses. I'd had desserts like that on Ile de Re so wanted to experiment. I haven't got it quite right. I also followed a recipe for lemon meringue pie / tart which i used to make almost weekly without blinking an eye!!!!!!!
I started it on New Year's Eve... because between the dinner party and NYE I'd made 12 mince pies with my own pastry and jar of 2005 vintage mincemeat! YUM!
The dinner party took me almost two days to clean, lay table prettily, find candles, plates, glasses and prep the food so that when guests arrived I had little to do except get food hot and plated!
C and JC loved the atmosphere with candles in several places and frankincense in the air.
I loved doing it but well out of practice!

It took several days for me to clear up as I have no dishwasher but between so I socialised and did other things! 

Christmas Day Menu 2014

 Breakfast at Z'Adore, La Couarde

Déjeuner at Le Belem, St Martin-en-Ré 

The 35e menu was served with a red Sancerre and water

Médaillon de thon mariné aux épices douces

Filet de bar rôti, sauce beuure blanc, étuvée de légumes frais

Gros macaron au caramel et aux pommes followed by coffee and brandy