Friday, 13 March 2015

At the setting of the sun....

It is a terrible thing when Life dies, especially of a human being and someone whom one has known...when one is bereft, when his family and his dear friend E. is bereft....when yet the sun still shines and the birds still sing and Spring springs again indulging on French soil, when Barrie would have been so full of delight for this place that he came to.

I might have some info incorrect. Forgive me if I have. I write this public tribute to say how much I appreciated someone whom I knew very little.

I hadn't seen Barrie for four or five years. I don't read local blogs on a regular basis but was shocked when I discovered that an Englishman, a sort of friend from a while ago,  had died in France.  Thank you to the person whose blog announced his death.  I respected the man enormously in life so wished to be there to respect him, even in death.  I cancelled appointments and drove the distance.  He was a wonderful gentle man...different, kind, calm, funny, a man who loved his garden, who loved colour, who loved architecture, who was an engineer, who loved the sea and La Rochelle, who drove to France in his red sports car with his then best friend, his parrot in a cage, who still speaks and will miss Barrie! He helped lots of people to settle in France and enjoyed working in retirement.
D and I met him  as an acquaintance a long time ago.  I forget how, but it wasn't in order to employ him.  I was always fascinated by his immaculate silver-grey hair, his dark brown, nay, black caterpillar eyebrows, his lovely accent, his knowledge and simplicity, his calm but probable, possible naughty demeanour.   He had a good taste in music I remember.  I was sad for him and his wife when they separated. There was something not quite right, yet they were both fluent in French, had immersed themselves in French village culture, football and belote, happy, but there was unhappiness.  Later, I felt their pain whilst I was feeling the pain that was about to descend on me! Since then, he found his companion and was happy.  I am glad.
The funeral service was eloquent, like him, but his parrot stayed at home!  His family read a well scripted eulogy which evidently he had helped to write.  His hat rested on the coffin...he always wore a hat!  I sent him my thoughts and those from D as requested.  If I had known he was ill I would have gone to see him but didn't know and hadn't known where he was living!  On enquiry, I was told that he'd had intestinal cancer for a year that he knew of, but the treatment became worse than the symptoms, so he gave up... I think I would too!  When the chips are down I am sure one will know.
IT IS  a sad loss for Barrie.  He was happy with his companion and happy with his family. It is a sad loss that a man aged 70 has been deprived of the country he loved,  deprived of his own happiness and that happiness he shared with others and of course that his family have been deprived of him.
It was a reverential AU REVOIR... it was happily done... he would have enjoyed it,  especially when some of us were trying not to dance in the aisle to SULTANS OF SWING!
Thank you Barrie for your advice from time to time and thank the powers that be that enabled me to be there... that one last goodbye.  May your descendants be granted 'bon courage' for all the French admin as well as grief and bereavement.  You touched the lives of those who live in France. I am sure other people would have been there to say FAREWELL if they had known or if they were here in France.  Farewell Barrie.

The setting sun on my way home.

1 comment:

It would be lovely to hear what you think.