Chateauroux: 2 of 3

After lunch we did a recommended route to look at 19th buildings.
This one needs a good clean and care by the Notaires who work there or by the Region as it is so beautiful. Needs a bit of TLC to honour it!  However, walk to the back and it is so ugly!  Note the architect and sculptor plus the decorative panel camouflaging the hole to the basement.

sunfllowers?

Then we lurch from one epoch to another as across the road is a 'lean-towards-the-road' structure.. part of the cinema, library, parking and who knows what else complex

Also opposite is this:

and this...

and this...

Having walked through all that... there was an impressive 20th century frontage incorporating the individual elements but walking along I was not in a position to capture the curving, glass frontispiece, which I did not like!  We came to the 'Chapel of the Redemptorists' .. disused but at one time an Unemployment office... three steel chimneys were acting as an aeolian pipe, humming away! I wonder if the architect who created the heating system was aware that this would happen?

This building was not mentioned on the leaflet of the route.  Most of the coloured decorative work had fallen off.

Then another lovely doorway!  Again not mentioned on the inadequate leaflet.

Look at the former wealth of the Post Office building!  But later, I didn't think to take a pic of the now disused sorting office by the railway and bus station.

This building was a former fencing house!  I rather like the sculptures. BUT we only knew what it was from the promenade leaflet.  No plaque to celebrate its heritage or to explain history and art to passers-by.  AND it is being used by wealthy notaires, lawyers or architects!

HOWEVER marvel at these:
and look at this link about the construction of GUITARDES:
http://www.historicalcarpentry.com/guitarde---beautiful-french-dormers.html
where it describes these buildings.
This one is beautiful:

but just along the road was a carousel / manège with windows!!!!! Never seen one like that before! It seemed a pity to have that at the end of a clean, attractive modern "residential public courtyard".  Bit like the awful chichi wagon at la Place near the eating establishments. I tripped over his cable.. no health and safety concerns at all!

More guitardes, french dormer windows showing the skills of carpentry trade.

they must have had a head for height!...this one on the tipple.. whoops ... topple!

In between those buildings I found some other interesting, more elegant dormers... more my style!

More guitardes on the house you could buy!

I like the star  .. I could have had one or two of those on my lucarnes instead of my little birds!

and a balcony would be a treat!

Now that I have used three hours of my time in creating these two posts and the next, giving my body time to recover from the aches and pains of driving, walking and several weeks of work PLUS medical intervention,  I ought to move about, get my mind working on what needs to be achieved in the next couple of weeks.

It is cold again after a few days of warmer daytime weather.
In the afternoon it was hot enough to wear shorts and tee shirt whilst I dug the green manure into the soil,planted potatoes, carrot seeds, Italian chicory, radish and peas.
Seeds are various stages of age and so they may or may not grow!

Chateauroux: 1 of 3

Driving across meadows, fields and ponds of La Brenne in earlyish morning bright sunlight, finding one open café bar for breakfast: a hot chocolate with an apricot croissant from Saturday's supermarket shopping expedition was a small adventure.

We kept to the road and arrived for a second time in Chateauroux.

With about ten years in between I am still unimpressed, although it seems less dark, more spacious.
I suspect I have missed much on this whirlwind walk. I realise I didn't come across the Museum nor did I get to the botanical park that I believe is somewhere there.
I try to take in the historical information on the various burgundy coloured notice boards but somehow I feel it is only a small nod to the number of famous people and historical events that occurred here.. Somehow I would like the town to make more of itself.

YET... Witness a town hanging onto a few medieval buildings, where then, once tanners, carders, weavers and drapers lived and worked in great numbers, where today, number 51 is unmarked on the street that it is in,  and marked up the hill in the side road. Its  proclaimed mullion windows, mentioned on the visitors  have been ripped out in favour of modern secondary glazing.
HOW CAN THAT HAVE BEEN ALLOWED? ... and when did that happen?  Such a shame!

However, the lavoir, below the huge convent building high on the cliff edge, where on the outside you could see the barred windows of their cells, was beautifully reconstructed.   Barrels were placed to help people stand whilst they washed the linen. I couldn't see how that would have worked!

Postscript: Perhaps the floor was lower earthdirt in medieval and after times, before the team of volunteers etc "renovated" this architectural treasure .... and so the women would have STOOD and their elbows would be at barrel height and so SO SO... they would have STOOD to wash their linen-oh! 

Rant:
Why can't architects leave things alone or put architecture back to how it WAS even using modern equivalents? 
I was required to have my roof repair / replacement overseen by the Architecte de Batiments de France yet in the town nearer the eye of  the church  houses have been allowed to have modern roller blinds and windows that do not conform to shape and size... VELUX I can cope with... double glazing too but it has to be in keeping.  
The problem is there does not seem to be control over STYLE... even if one needs certain planning permissions! 

And what kind of oil was milled here?

 Drainage work.... and maybe afterwards they will cobble the ground anew which seems to have been done very nicely in some areas of the town.

St Martin's Gate .. once a prison .. is a remainder and reminder of ancient ramparts from the 12th to 15th centuries on which the Chateau Raoul was built... giving the name of the town.

This next, was near the pavement to one side of someone's door...something to do with an average level??? Water? not sure!

 A bit of architectural fun!

The old "elegant" Mairie/Town Hall faces the modernistic "ugly" Market Place.  As far as I can understand a lot of the town was "modernised" since the mid 1970's... not the best architectural period!

There are replicas of Gallo Romain sculptures on the side of the old Le Mairie, now being used as a Music School.  We could a hear a xylophone being practised.

Although I sat opposite the new Mairie eating spinach and salmon quiche with Earl Grey tea for lunch, I didn't take a photo. 

 

Owning property is never labour free

MAY 1st... Labour Day!
Muguet has not flouished in the last year of dormancy; it has mostly died when it had been good for several years. There is just a little of the Lily of the Valley surviving and one flower stem.

A few days ago we went to the LOFT cinema in Chatellerault to see the Australian film of the memoirs "TRACKS"... after the novel of the memoirs of the Camel Lady who crossed the desert in 1975.

I really enjoyed it.. One needs the BIG screen.  However, i thought the actress never looked sufficiently dishevelled!   Brave woman in reality!   Inspiring and motivating . No, I could not do that!

I had been bored with blogging but feel an urge to write and publish once again!
I also feel a need to get 'out and about in real life', on real adventures, however small, like that of yesterday, but it helps to have company some of the time!

Sixth Anniversary

I have owned this house for six years today.

Then, it was a warm day when I sat in La Roche Posay with four brothers, whose parents' house I bought.

Today, whilst the sun peeps through from time to time, it is extremely cold.

My friend / former partner, whom I have anguished much over in the last six years, despite his absolute kindness and generosity, borne of guilt and obligation in helping me renovate this house,  but also suiting his own needs, wished to walk today.   I did too, as work on the kitchen has stopped for a while.  He is resting before his next assignment... (not here).  I am resting before all the next things that I have to do.

More about the walk today in the bitter wind and rain... and the many things that have happened in the last month or two,  once I get time alone to write and organise the photos, the technology of which is beyond me on how to store them so I can access easily!  Also, for me writing has to be a slo time, a time when I can indulge my own thinking. I do it for me and nto for anyone else.  A sort of diary I suppose.

Computers are a painful but useful tool!

Later!

Not an apple for an eye

I have been very p***** off with Apple ...

a few weeks ago, albeit my fault for not remembering which password the mini ipad required after I had reluctantly pressed the button to agree / OK the software update.... it disabled!!!!!!!!!!!

and after hours on the phone to the american apple company whose employees were in Greece and UK with american accents... I knew that I could not enable the ipad with my laptop because the apple mac pro laptop is too old, despite what they said because I did believe the Norwich APPLE STORE that my laptop cannot be upgraded to El Capitaine!!!!!!!!  The hardware is too old at about 8 years old!!!!!!!!

Today, I read the Guardian article on line and look:

I quote:

"Actually, ... Siri. We can tell you exactly why the world is falling out of love with Apple. We’ve been storing up these complaints for years. So, why don’t you just shut your British/American/Australian, male/female speech unit and listen?

1 The passwords

Signing into the iTunes store: Apple ID? Password? User password? Password for this Mac? System admin password? Password for password manager? Forgot? Given up? Gone to get a sledgehammer?"

YUP ... that is how I felt... get a hammer to it... NOW...
I have to take it to an APPLE STORE TO GET IT ENABLED!!!
This means UK or Bordeaux or Paris.
This just after the battery failed in my other machine, necessitating the swap or purchase of a revamped mini ipad... the consequences of which was not easy to deal with as they link the ipad to my computer passwords etc.... gggggrrrrrr... why can't an ipad machine be independent?

NO WONDER that ,one lively Sunday morning, I thought, which password do they mean?   By the time I had tried most of them I was logged out / disabled and  after several weeks I almost do not care!!!!!!!

Maybe now is the time for Windows 10! MY friend has bought a small computer rather like a tablet, where the keyboard can disconnect from the screen and use the integrated mouse...

H'm... Apple had better fix /  enable themselves before they crash out of the market!!!!!!

Yesterday's pain

Yesterday, we were forced to make a 40km apx / two hour return journey to Poitiers, to Leroy Merlin to be exact and return three sacks of tile adhesive marked with a fabrication date of 11/2015, bought at end of March 2016, kept in my kitchen room. Plus time spent in that green, orange and wh0te balloon-ed shop making the complaint,
More of that long and detailed tale later....


HOWEVER, en route through Monthoiron, a particularly interesting village, but where we usually never stop, I noticed a machine standing by the bus stop!!! How incongruous!
On the way home, deliberately taking the same route, we stopped, and YES, it was Distribupain or something like it!!!
No, I don't need any more pain, but BREAD would be good for lunch .. I fancy an egg sandwich!

WELL, by that time of the day, well after lunch hour, having had our floor laying plans scuppered, and not flawed or even floored by modernism, we pushed one euro in the shape of five 20cts pieces into the mouth of this monster and received a loaf of bread, baguette shaped, chewy and tasty, which we tore off chunks and ate on the way home leaving enough for an aforesaid egg, lettice and tomato sandwich!
You could buy one or two baguettes in a bag.
You could pay with espèces, billets ou avec une carte bancaire.......
He would have done the latter, but I like my hard currency ... lo, the day when I cannot use a euro or sterling currency, or any other coinage currency!

I reckon there were bread fairies in that there machine, making bread, bagging it up, taking the money... - one of them even said "Merci" in her very best french!!!!!!

Is this the way of the world .... !!!    ?????
Me thinks it's a jolly good idea in rural France, but please could we have croissants too? 



 

Kitchen

The plumbing for the central heating in the kitchen and for the sink is completed.
Not yet the radiators inthe grand salon as I said to do those later.. and also to ensure the system works without leaks  and the boiler fires up OK... It could be a warmer winter here!
The electrician finishes tomorrow.
Today we are shearing off the few mm along the bottom of the oak skirting board which is so well stuck onto the plasterboard that it would cost much damage to remove it!  We are doing that to slide the floor tiles underneath.
The walls have to have a final coat of paint but may need to be PVA'd... as the previous layers of paint seem to be absorbed leaving patches where coverage doesn't work. It has had two layers of F&B and I am loathe to do one more without attempting to try the technique we did on my bedrrom wall to solve a similar issue.
Flooring starts on Tuesday or Wednesday... The fllor has to be thoroughly cleaned and then the procedure as recommended by Le Roy MErlin followed with the products we have purchased.
I have to have medical intervention on April 26th and my friend leaves April 30th  or just before.. 
SO....
there are about 7 to 10 days to get the floor laid, to look tickety boo to receive the next phase starting toward the end of May!
The carcasses will arrive May 12 and the work top May 19.
I have left the splashback choice and installation until later!!!!!!
I must go and order appliances from DARTY.

I need a rest,  a change of scenery, me time and some laughter.
However, the garden is screaming for help... so no real rest can be had.
I love working in the garden and outside, listening to the birds and bees, but then indoor jobs scream for attention too!

I have had an excellent week working with my friend. He seems to be a changed man ... fait attention.... and we have been more relaxed to enjoy company together.

Yesterday, after Ikea, I intended to drive to La Confluence of the Loire and Vienne  to try to find fritallaries but we only got as far as Chapelle aux Naux. We then abandoned the vehicle and walked to Langeais but not into the chateau which looks very inviting.  We meandered through the streets. Drank Oriental tea falvoured with pineapple, passion fruit and I forget what else.  He had a foiegras, veal and Grand Marnier pie. We echanged a spoonful of each. VERY YUM!

It was really lovely to walk elsewhere, see architecture and take pics of new things and places.
I need to do more of that type of leisure! 

Another Songster

April 14th: whilst in the garden washing radiators the nightingale was heard in the distance.

I haven't felt like writing or posting for a long time.
Plus having guests leaves little time for my own indulgences.

In early March, my former partner returned yet again to help me tweak the last of the plan for the kitchen.  Having confidence in final measurements and decisions has escaped me.   But being able to discuss with a.n.other has brought about the final plan.

It is difficult to explain.  My conclusion after months of a mathematical headache is that Ikea and Schmidt software cannot handle the fact that the furniture measurement of a linear length is differen from the worktop linear length. Now the fitter friend has cracked the problem and even he did not see what could be done for ages.  He is a man who solves as he goes. I want the problem solved on paper before I waste money on an expensive error!

In addition to that conundrum as well as other things,  my friend says he can understand WHY it has taken me so long, not to mention that in between addressing the KITCHEN PLAN I have had other things to do!
He seems to accept my claim that if it were UK I would have had my new kitchen well before now.   Trying to have something suitable for the character of the house plus suitable for my pocket has been a scary issue.

One of the main problems has been that the estimate for the electricity***  is costing more than the kitchen furniture and worktop!
(*** this includes plumbing and replacing the last of the radiators to the walls and verifying the central heating system.. and now rather than staging payments and therefore WORK I have decided to PLUNGE ahead and hopefully avoid drowning!)

This week the electrical wiring has been replaced!!!!!! Quel horreur!

I will try to write about this soon but I am very glad I freaked out on Monday, after almost 9 months after getting the first electrician here to make an estimate for the kitchen.  This he did not do until February as in September last year there was miscomprehension between us when I asked for estimates for the water heater. I decided not to return to them and that was based on my previous experiences with a different electrician.

I freaked out because all the work we did last year was being ruined.  When he returned two days later he had a new system of installing the wiring, in compliance with my request that was agreed with the estimator.   I might try and explain this better later.  For now, I am too tired! 

I am wishing I HAD asked this company to replace the water heater.
Never mind!!!!!!  That was in the past.

It appears that I CAN get the water heater (chauffeau electrique) connected to heures creuses et pleins because very soon the new tableau electrique will be able to serve the system!
The other electrician ( not the one who caused me emotional angst) did not do that even though I had insisted it was HC and HP!
I am glad i did not choose a  third choice of electrician, an independent auto-entrepeneur because he might have had to order materials whereas this company has everything in the van and seems to be a man who can!

The number of wires in a kitchen has more than surprised me.
How can one have more Surprise!
Oh, oh so easily in France!

BUT back to hearing the nightingale.
It is a song that insists I must get out into the countryside for walks.
I haven't done nearly enough walking nor cycling since before my fever in February.

March has received guests every day, First "my friend" (in inverted commas because the blog tells all and my friends will understand). Then my daughter and only grand daughter, now aged 8 arrived for 8 days.   At the same time I hosted a friend who bought a house in the village but it is not yet habitable.  Days were eventful with the worst scenario of a car breakdown. Maybe more later if I ever get time to write - the starter motor died in IKEA car park at 20h after a 5 hour marathon in not the IDEAL home base. We were an hour and a half drive from home and I had to get them to the airport the next day. For some reason my insurance would not take us home or get the car repaired in time!
Miracles then began.
See, they can in France!
Then "my friend" returned from UK because he did not wish to stay here at same time as all those females!   It was best!!!!!!

And so... for the last week ...following all that has happened in the last year,  
THE NEW KITCHEN IS HAPPENING.
Tra la la la la!  A new song will be sung!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Malheureusement, not in time for April 30th, the 6th anniversary of me, myself and I owning this property!!!!! 

Songster without song

I have not had even ONE Easter egg!!!!!
Must be the first time ever in my life!
First time this year at nine ish in the morning I celebrate MY first hearing of THE CUCKOO!!! 

POEM:  Songster calling
Copyright by SweetpeainFrance
28 March 2016

Stand at the edge of an ancient woodland,
where on higher land the wild wind blows 
straight from south west Atlantic ocean,
where Katie and her storm force troops blew her gales
as if to push winter northwards where she hails.

Perhaps this songster blew in with the wind, 
one only ambition 
to forge new generation
but hardly to sing!

In the early hours of morning I entered, ventured to the yard
whilst warm gusty, blustery winds were yelling at my side
as I closed French folding shutters blowing freely in the wind,
eased to fix the wooden gates creaking, moaning as they moved
checked the garden to the rear, make sure nought was unkind,
put on the kettle, made a cup of tea,
went back to sleep like a baby peacefully, 
slept deep and soundly 'til shoulders aching waked me,
walked to breathe oxygen, stretch legs, arms aerobically.

Hark, what do I hear? 
that welcome sound as the first in the year -
that refreshing call of spring time -
that sound so known for its songster calling -
that tune so known for its major third - 
when a cruel and wicked mother bird
ousts eggs which have a right to their nest
laying her own for another mother to do its best 
feeding insects to the cuckoo, a brood parasite
as the new born throws out others with its spite
an unsuspecting mother bird uses energy in flight 
to feed the growing imposter all day and night!

A refreshing call just after the Spring Equinox!
Bringing HOPE for summer 
Better than any chocolate box!

SO Sorry for UK and terrible experiences.
I have not ventured out of my gate in several days...other than this short walk
today.
I am ready for what I HOPE to be the final ( fifth ) IKEA visit to order the kitchen..
All is measured more than once; solutions to problems have been found with one other person to help add a voice and opinion, motivation, realise the difficulties and the frustration, realise that it wasn't all me that I became disillusioned and more!
So despite the accusatory tone from several people that I have not been doing my best.. if one saw the paperwork plans then one would realise the differences between a room which needed another 5cm linear length to comfortably fit ... but now it works in the room and on the paper and hopefully on the ickilogiciel....
Flooring is purchased and will be laid in two weeks time.
There is a choice of three electrician and plumbing companies... I am waiting for estimates to be updated.. and waiting an email response before the final decision!

Swallow in the sky

Into official Spring time ...

there above, in a blue sky,
flies a lone swallow, 

so exciting to witness,
so hopeful a promise
of happiness and hope.

Company

Today is the day when I gain company ... and I HOPE ... round the table communication, negotiation, and all those other skills I used to have when working in the educational world.  I have done a lot of work on the planning of my kitchen and also I have not done enough to formulate a complete decision.  Not many people have ever chosen a complete kitchen but I admire them.
I have been blighted by waiting for funds to build up and apart from winter hibernation,  crabby moods, illness and all other responsibilities that come with being a property owner, I have been blighted by electricians!!!!!!  
HOWEVER, I have hope and maybe the second one that came last July might be the one!   I have waited for devis and they have not arrived!
I also am going to explore the other French kitchen company because there is still something about me that resists IKEA ... or the one and a half hour journey each way and their apparently high delivery and installation costs.
I have found a work top colour.  I like it that it is not black, grey or wood.
Anyway, I must away... I must fly like a little bird, see the blue skies and the sunshine!

First March and a dragon!

I would like the imminent arrival of my friend, to be so, rather than a foe, but I can imagine his frustrations experienced by such a sensible and capable person, when I have daily frustrations with me, myself, I, personally, within the circumstance that I live.

However, I am up against acquiring estimates from reliable electricians as well as to find those who I have confidence. A discussion today with a friend who knows one of those who has been here to estimate the cost, set me back into DOUBT... aaaargh...

Then there is the flooring. I feel confident about my choice if it is still in the shops. I would like wood! Having just oiled one oak floor it doesn't take so long to dry if one warms the 50 / 50 mixture beforehand and does not slather on too thickly.  Two coats done!!!  The linseed / turps has changed the colour of the wood, now looking bright and shiny!  The other two oak floors need one more coat. I was stopped in my tracks with back problems in November after I had moved furniture and oiled the floors on my knees......

Then there is the furniture and the positioning of the appliances. The placement of the oven is still grieving me... I would like it mid level but I do not want it to impose visually in the room where one steps down into the room which has four doors and a window. I am convinced to go for the U shape rather than the L shape so hopefully my friend will be patient and offer advice suggestions on the last detail.

I have measured out the floor plan and the wall plan and have even taped where the splashback, extraction unit, plugs, switches and lighting have to go.  Have not chosen the splashback.   I do have an IKEA plan ... fourth model... but it will have to be re-verified for items because I have changed the positioning a little!

If we have to do the flooring, take a break, do the electrics, take a break, get the IKEA stuff , take a break , order appliances, take a break and then install it all then so be it!!!!!!!!!!!

If he gives up on me then so be that too!!!!!!!!
I hope not.

Now, to stop blogging and posting and wasting other task time!

An extra day

It would have been nice to be doing something that I have never done before...

The flurry did not stay

About a week ago, with colder temperatures turning rain into a colder form, there was the first flurry of snow in my garden. I couldn't capture the fact that the large snowflakes were like giant white v shaped wasps coming into land or miniature white geese landing.  My imagination saw that as I stared into the white blur! This part of my rose and lavender had only a day or two before been weeded of grass growing in the wrong place!

Cakes and ill health but now I am betterererer

The recent E-coli UT infection, which I believe I have had for six months, trying to cure naturally, prevented me from going to the CCC.  Damn it!

My first cake baked in my newly second hand oven was not the "Love is in the air" themed planned recipe. HOWEVER I will make it for the next guest!  That'll be a laugh!!!!!!!! (in-joke!)

My first cake baked in my splendid gifted but paid for oven was a Lemon Drizzle cake without icing to share with my friend who likes low sugar products and hardly eats cakes.  I wanted and needed to bake once that course of antibiotics had given me more energy by hopefully wiping out the infection. I am being monitored!

So... cake it was ... butter, sugar, 4 eggs, ground almonds and hazelnuts, maize flour, (the recipe said cornmeal and I got that wrong thankfully!!!) drenched in lemon zest and juice.. nice with  freshly sliced pear...improving with age whilst kept wrapped in the refrigerator!   I AM VERY HAPPY WITH MY OVEN!!!!!

Since then I have baked a baby chicken, roasted stuffed red peppers with fennel, roasted veg including a new one for me roasted broccoli and made jacket potatoes...I need English potatoes please!!!

Book Review: The Promise of Happiness

by Justin Cartwright - Bloomsbury Books - 2004

I would like to read other books by this author. This book was borrowed. I started it on December 27th 2015.It took a few reads to get into.  Then, having given up on at least three occasions, I became addicted.

Absolutely a great weaving of threads. Each family character is revealed as the story unfolds around daughter Juliet, with the sense of justice or injustice that she endured.  Her passion and interest in glass bring her and members of her family to deal with, or not, the various interplay of emotions that goes on between people,  to encounter and face emotional injury, present and past lovers, addiction, compassion, secrets, truths, lies about who they each are and what keeps FAMILY together.  It provokes thoughts on core values - on morality.  It is a story that incorporates at the very least, fear, responsibility for one's own life, betrayal, guilt, freedom, redemption, forgiveness, compromise and understanding. What is love? filial, romantic, enduring....
Out of despair brings hope seemed to be the underlying theme in the pursuit of the reality that Happiness comes and goes, and is dependent and not dependent!
Set partially in America. However, the epicentre of the story was set in a little part of Cornwall I had the good fortune to be near a few Autumns ago. I still wish to walk that coast and the coastline of England! 
The story is about the quirkiness of FAMILY happiness : the woven threads of a dream if one is fortunate!!!!!!!!!  Ah... promises that little babes in arms bear...

groanmoan

This must be the worst French "bienvenue" I have ever attended.. it WAS wine... mixed with pamplemousse or something sweet and sickly!  Why can't we have a decent boxed wine!?  Other people manage it and it isn't so expensive! 
Yes please some apple juice as not everyone drinks orange juice. At one event there was cidre and I couldn't find the wine. So home I went!
If the village is so strapped for cash why don't they put the NEW YEAR event at a time when families with children may attend ... not just us old codgers ... and why did it appear that there were few complete "étrangers" there...apart from les Parisiens. etc. At least I learned a few things when I'd also taken my friend, a new owner of a maison secondaire!
As I pointed out at one meeting it is difficult to find out from anyone what is happening in the village.
Why don't they ask us to bring food "à partager" - then sit for an evening meal once the formalities have been endured.   Why do we have to stand???
The Office du Tourisme -'la même' although at least they provided paperwork to support their performance over the year at their AGM... but likewise no decent wine  and the most appalling canapés. Am I such a snob with my French roots?   NO!   What happened to French standards!!!!!!????    I just think we should all give and take ... not just take! 
Admittedly people were friendly... more friendly at the OT event.
WE need to support our village to stop it crumbling under the weight of the financial needs of the crumbling chateau and the weight of more than 15,000 visitors in the summer which transform this village from a morgue into a place of delight... (ah the restaurants - let's not mention those!!!) and the weight of the part time residents who possibly as in Southwold UK are not paying their share of local taxes... I do not know... and draining the resources... although with Southwold it is like Little London!!!!!!and the Londoners and Northerners pile in in droves... It is a family home of mine!!!!!
Why can't we aim to be like a Little Paris... we have the roots of lingerie embroidery here!!!!!!!!!! and of course the English invaded many a year ago... it's my village as much as theirs!

I will try to mention about chateau funding in another post if I find the energy.

a real oven

Imagine my fortune when three days ago I was offered the opportunity to purchase a freestanding cooking oven and hob!
How more-than-lucky am I!!!!!!!!!!

It arrived yesterday... such lovely, lovely people brought it over and installed all the meticulously clean pieces and made sure it was working!
This, just in time to practice cake baking skills for the next CCC.
I have to admit I am very nervous as I have not baked a cake since August.
Well, I did try to make one in the micro-combi oven but it did was more of a pud than a cake!

Shopping list: eggs!!!!!!!

ADDED NOTE: Have not had an OVEN since August 2015! A micro-combi inherited as a gift in September, a slow cooker and a steamer have been helpful but they are not the same!

Wtfiiaa?

This particular blog started as a way of recording the renovation of a property... much as many others have used a blog format as a journal.

However, it also became unintentionally, a vehicle for an emotional journey, after the break-up of what I thought was a relationship made-in-heaven.  No such thing exists, I have discerned.  My vulnerable dream was shattered by my own negative energies and those of another.  My dream of having a relationship that incorporated all that I dreamt of in terms of 'happy family' sharing when my parents never did, came to fruition fleetingly and then was quickly dissolved by irritability. scorn, criticism and blame and maybe other stuff.  Let's not go down that road for now!

This blog has seen a few up and down episodes of my personal life since 2010 or whenever I started to blog, in retrospect to that time that I bought my property.  This blog has also commented on places and events.  It has witnessed my observations of, and in, my village and surroundings.  I try to avoid personal and family pics.  I try to be cautious with global internet exposure but sometimes fail!

On occasions I tried the challenge of blogging every day of a month by writing articles ahead of time when the facility to do that became a possibility,  or I discovered it!  It takes time to get photos prepped and an article written.  I have posted deliberately and unconsciously as a form of creativity, as well as avoidance of doing other tasks - let's call that procrastination!

Sometimes I write ahead, then edit and re-edit before publishing.  Most often I write and publish.  To the discerning few who bother to read this ego-centred self-published material, they may have identified that sometimes I edit after publishing.  Sometimes I feel I've been too public with the emotional outpouring.  Or a poem needs to be improved or altered to make it, in my mind, better!  Or my form of dyslexia has come to be too garbled in its word-salad, so I have to rewrite the nonsense sentences into ones that can be understood and not misinterpreted!

Sometimes there have been major gaps between postings, where I've become silent, unmotivated, dispirited, when words or creativity are blocked.  The gaps might signify I have been occupied or that I have nothing worthy of publication. The gaps may signify that I have been in a dark hole of depression or contemplation of the thought:  "W--- t--  f---  i-  i-  a--  a----?"
This posting is in itself an admission of that.  Excuse me for any sensitivities of the use of an expletive. Isn't it amazing how few letters are required for one to be able to read a sentence? My children at school loved that they could read, if I covered the ascenders or descenders of letters!

It is also an admission that I do NOT produce this for others... I produce it for me. Very ego-centred!  I am aware and what is wrong with that form of artistry?  I do not seek compliments but if you wish to make them then I feel honoured.  If you feel you want to refute me or disagree then you can do that too!  My blog is a kind of diary.  I am proud of it.  I am proud  of the progress I have made in writing skills when at the end of my career I was writing absolute goobledy-gook for important documents: no one told me!!!  - no one even understood - least of all did I realise that dyslexia manifests itself under stress. I feel it is remarkable what I have achieved given that at the age of 17 I had not much idea about literacy! From an early age I read the dictionary at bedtime to learn vocabulary and spelling because I'd read the main reading material - the family print company's selection of Charles Dickens novels.

I have made progress coping with and in the particular challenges I've experienced of living in France.  All the downs and all the ups.  It is called LIFE and possibly would not be any different wherever I lived.  I am who I am!  However, I think the very fact that one lives in a different culture where the primary language is my secondary language, does make an enormous difference to sanity, as also does the fact that the country is huge.  To go to a supermarket or anywhere to experience culture is a often a long journey necessitating the ownership of a vehicle!

My former blog tried very hard to gloss over the hidden REALITY that was not exposed to others in the lifestyle that my former partner and I were living,  although there were some who knew and who were helpless to help, because as for all of us, there is only one who can make a difference, and that person inside us needs a certain amount of  knowledge, skills and talents that perhaps doesn't quite exist when it is required.  Some friends and members of my family said they would not read either of my blogs because the first was not REAL!  It was my real!  It was often the better parts of life as it stood then in a chocolate box cottage surrounded by sheep and a pony where I learned to write poetry.  We had some wonderful positive experiences and I really should find the time and expertise to transform these blogs into book format.  For me. for my grand child.  For posterity or they can burn it at a later date!

People make things. I have done so. I made music.  I fed children's curiosity. I have in the past sewn,  crocheted, knitted etc. I like to write.  My poetry is quite substantial now and this too I would like to get published alongside my photography such as it is!

Meanwhile the spectre of a kitchen room haunts me...
It seems so obscene,  the price it will cost to have the kitchen room electrics rewired for first and second fix!  The flooring seems reasonable but I am undecided on wood or ceramic that looks like wood but I think real wood will win the day!  Then the furniture  and appliance costs seem so obscene.  Yet what I love is expensive. I have expensive tastes as a pauper!  My mother aged 89, said to my daughter when giving her a Christmas gift and not one for me, that I have everything I need!!!!!!!  Maybe she is correct. I have relatively exceptional health for someone my age and I am stil young even if old but I hold no bars to my daughter...who gasps at some things I say... and yet it is tame, very tame, compared to some tigers! All my life my mother has always said that I have ideas above my station! And indeed I have... and wtfiiaa in this isolated west facing property  on the outskirts of a beautiful ( so they say) village!!!!  They don't live here!  Let's not go down that road.

The Post

"Faites attention!"   I am warned today in the village shop.
To make it easier for "les vendeurs des timbres" il y a un nouveau systeme!
BUT it is more expensive for those who are sending mail.
So I must pay attention.

Letter post from France to England or Europe:-
0 - 20g             one stamp   
22g - 100g       two stamps
101g - 250g     five stamps
251g - 500g     eight stamps
501g - 3000g  fourteen stamps

I think the shop owner said one stamp was 70 cts...
My letter weighed 111g for England... yet, if I had taken out some of the non urgent papers and sent them in another letter I would have saved the cost of one or two stamps!!!
 I will print the chart and weigh letters at home before I venture to the post office.
A few days ago I sent a wooden times table square to my grand daughter. I hadn't seen one of these in UK and thought that playing a game with it would help her see the numerical patterns. She is quite good at Maths but as Y3 the quicker she learns them by whatever means the better!
Well,  it cost me 8 stamps to post it when the item cost me about 2 euros and probably cost tuppence to make and the labourers who made it probably didn't even get a bowl of soup. (***See below)  Crazy world!  I wonder what the value of  the first penny post would be in today's economy?

THE PAST
***   When I first started teaching in 1972  the school had few resources in the very East of England.
I spent every evening making resources with the card that they supplied and any pictures from free or bought magazines and brochures etc that I could lay my hands on.  Then I had to cover them with sticky back plastic.  I spent my own money on resources too!   This was for a reception class where 30 kids roamed the room in an orderly fashion to and from individual or group educational tasks / games. It was a logistical wonder. The then Deputy Headteacher was my guru!  No wonder my marriage failed as my poor husband could not understand my enthusiasm and obsession for making new progressive teaching resources every minute that I was at home!!!!!!!!!!

Oh how he would have marvelled....

Maybe he knew ... that there is a new named constellation in the stars..... so cool an idea ... even if there is a dispute about its apparent location near Mars... or the distance between the stars...

http://www.theguardian.com/music/2016/jan/18/david-bowie-astronomers-give-the-starman-his-own-constellation

and the words of one of his songs leapt into my mind ....  Oh you pretty things

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBQ-S6njQQw

Admirable musical talent and voice... of only he could witness the accolades! I'm waiting for my copy of Blackstar at number one in the British charts today.  I have no system to play it!  Ironic that it is his first number one after his death.

It's all too easy

whilst living alone, at this age, to be like Bowie, apparently obsessed with anxieties and fears of loss, mental health, death etc.... but oh, if only one had his ability to create.
The mind has a terrible habit of wandering and bringing to the fore the most weirdest of thoughts!
I blurb about my own!
I wish I'd been artistically creative.

When two GREAT ARTISTs have died within one week, including the inspirational Alan Rickman, the inevitable demise (a friend bluntly says 'it is natural wastage!') results in the inevitable analyses and re-runs of performances presented now through internet media, by those reporters who are living.  Thankfully the radio and internet are enough for me without television.  The resultant articles are extremely informative filling the gaps in my knowledge, but also have beckoned me and others to Look Back, be it in Joy or Anger, or any other emotion.  It helps a grieving process. It also wakens one up to get a move on whilst life is present!!!!!!

...to get things in order to support my adult children when they will have their hour of need in one hopes some grief of trawling through my personal stuff!!! I must leave it tidy! I must do this and that. But the doing of it is HARD! VERY DIFFICULT!

Getting the kitchen planned has taken so many hours and days. The room stares at me, defies me, says "it should be easy" and yes, it should. I think this, then that but have to return to the first or second idea because of available space etc.

I am aware of the start of the victim mode and want to be rescued!  That will not do. I have to find the adult mode and be responsible. I bought the house. I took out the kitchen  with the help of another because it was very damaged and unaesthetic ... and NOW ... ho ho ho it costs an arm and leg to instal a complete kitchen ... I still have two arms and legs and so I must afford it, whatever the future scenario!  The sooner, the better and then I can be more free.

It is all too easy for any one of us to judge another. All this baggage we claim!  It comes around again and again until we have sorted out the emotional pain we have gained in our very lives.
It's our pain and doesn't belong to anyone else.

It comes around again and again as we come into contact with REAL PEOPLE in our lives... not just those who have through celebrity status influenced our ideas on art and music, history, literature, geography, travel, food and other culture, textiles, nature, science technology, politics, economics, psychology, etc at the heart of our belief values and boundaries, but also those whom we have met fletteingly or deeply affecting our innermost core.

Bowie did what he could to transform his oddity and VOILA at the end of his life it was ashes to ashes ... and that is probably all we are. Maybe there will be a spirit or a soul that might squeeze through the gates of heaven but in my case.. .......I'd better start working harder.
Never too late .. is it?

Thinking outside of the box

RANDOM THOUGHTS THAT POP INTO MY HEAD ... in this case, as I light the woodburner and look at the crisp clear blue sky.

I have thought this, in this link which I include here ... not so much about his music but his eloquent intellectual style:
he was the one who did open the theatrical door onto a world already heading in that direction of openness in the late 70s...
who did make it OK for people to experiment with who they are to find their true person.
This man who has just died seems to have almost a godly persona .. and I believe he really has walked into the gates of heaven!   I also believe that his life, now ended, will ricochet causing new positive developments in a modern world which is already changing.

The BBC one can share the link:   http://bbc.in/1n7er5h  
and if that link does not work:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/music/articles/d5c291be-258c-4217-922e-38f9d78de878

and so I do agree ....

For some months, I've been trying to fathom out why my daughter is as she is... I have been thinking that her because it is my opinion that she has not been using her creativity, her intelligence, her happiness, her  complex talents...one would perhaps think she isn't very intelligent but she has deep, deep knowledge that is blocked for some reason.   She finds it difficult to be consistent - don't many of us?  That in itself is a consistency in that she is inconsistent!!!!!!
Creativity is important.. people cannot live around the internet...I know this about my own behaviour.  Two different peas in a pod!

As a young, naive person with television in the house, which I didn't often like to watch when family did on a boringly basis,  I didn't know about the REAL world but I did tap into the aural one.  We had loud, non stop rock music in our houses, once I'd left home. I also played classical stuff as a music student, until I managed to find Radio 4 and 'Woman's Hour' in my life.   My husband played Indian music.  One rental was a student house, the next in the middle of a field attached to a neighbour  was a house sit where we were mindful of sound levels. Another was a detached house in the middle of rural England where the nearest neighbour was some distance!   Great years for feeling a sense of freedom and an attempt at 'the good life'.  They were the times, the early 1970s when even though one was a rebel one still did what establishment said ... for example, following what the BABY BOOKS said about babies... and I very much regret their advice to leave the screaming child who needed a hug to sob itself to sleep!!!!!!!

The internet for me is a wonderful tool for personal self learning and to learn about psychology, but as David Bowie said it comes with a WARNING LABEL: those are not his words.   He warns of the creativity of the tool but also of the dangerous aspects which indeed that prophecy is indeed true.

In the last 24 hours I have discovered a very interesting man... also suffering from a common phenomena of anxiety about the world and self.

He thought outside of the box. In my younger years I too was encouraged to think sideways. However, my problem was that I was never proactive! 

Change is ongoing to the very end when it changes yet again

Lifted from The Guardian:
David Bowie:

“My entire career, I’ve only really worked with the same subject matter. The trousers may change, but the actual words and subjects I’ve always chosen to write with are things to do with isolation, abandonment, fear and anxiety, all of the high points of one’s life.”

  “I am not a natural performer,” Bowie said in a rare interview in 2002. “I don’t enjoy performing terribly much. Never have. I can do it and, if my mind’s on the situation, do it quite well. But, five or six shows in, I’m dying to get off the road and go back to the studio.”

It is a kind of comfort to me to realise that even the GREATEST have troubles with isolation, abandonment, fear and anxiety,
So........ i'st not only me, then ?  !!!!!!!!!   aaaaaaaarrrgh!
One must remember to focus on the higher points of one's life.
Even a star turns to dust and dances high in the skies.
God bless!

Changes: Tribute to a Hero

In shock!
Have sobbed, in gutted sadness to hear of the death of David Bowie...
the end of such an era!!!!!!!
A star scattering stardust on us young things.
A performer.
A stage player pushing horizons. 
An innovator.
An inventor.
A dreamer.
A reality man.
A genius.
A true true true musician.
A man so loved by many people in the world.
A respected man.
A huge influence on my thoughts of contemporary music in my formative years.. and even now.
An influence for so many musicians around the world.
A sad sad loss to the world .. when we could all be Heroes just for one day! 
GOODBYE MAJOR TOM from GROUND CONTROL!
Let me play his music all day.
I am heartbroken.
RESPECT for him and his family. 
 

Change: Stuff of life

Digits:  0 6 0 1 2 0 1 6 sound nice for this date of Epiphany.

I sometimes have a moment of sudden (and great) revelation or realization but never is it sufficiently great to move my life forward. I never seem to have a strong enough personal belief system.

Having got through Christmas and the change of year fairly unharmed from woes and wonders I now look for changes - doesn't everyone?   I hope for better experiences. It's all a case of the mind being willing. One needs stimulus, motivation and here in France I sometimes feel 'lost', unfulfilled when there is no one to talk to.  I feel I am still searching for something; meaningful people with whom I can relate, getting to grips with who I am!  I suppose it is everyone's quest!!!!!

This week I've told two people in my life, two people whom I have loved very much and still do as well as have respect towards, to go and do "Whatever makes them happy". It has been hard to say leave me alone but if I don't feel respected then why should I continue the friendships? 
I am wondering if it will be sustained.  One has agreed (but we had that before) and one has not even referred to my suggestion.  One has to stop telling me 'what I must do and by when" and to stop telling me about my own inadequacies.
It isn't a situation I have ever really found myself in.  Usually I am the person to be dumped!!!!!! haha!

OK I am indecisive at times, have difficulty with making choices at times, am inconsistent at times, and contradict myself at times.  YUP I am all of that...  Also I have been told not to rubbish other people ...  Funny that!  I think most people are guilty of forming judgements or opinions about others which includes criticisms and compliments.  Isn't that how we form an understanding of liking a person or not wishing to be near someone?  Understanding others isn't easy and requires enormous bags of patience, tolerance and REAL not surface communication.  I've had that with both friends.
I need friends with whom I can have fun, who are there for me when I need them and when I can be there if they need me! 

It is true that I haven't always treated others as I would wish to be treated. My mother and father were non existent role models. My mother was an extremely rude woman! My father intelligent but unworldly. Yet mother could be extremely kind and she was the driving force in the family.
Evidently, I irritate and annoy some people! I suppose it depends on the relationship or how others deal with others. Some of my friends listen very patiently and suggest and talk about life's experiences in the wider sense of the word and when that happens it is more supportive and I learn more!  To discuss is better than to be TOLD!

Getting things done - boxes to tick:

I told myself that 2014 and 2015 would be opportunities to SORT STUFF and to some extent I have done some but not enough.

I start one task and then stop / deviate as something else demands Attention. Physical health is much better but laziness is current. Maybe it is hibernation. Excuses for procrastination! Procrastination has to be ousted!  Inertia borne out of laziness, insufficient stimulus or necessity needs to be banished to take ACTION.

After 36 hours of REST, in darkened room emerging for attempts at daily life,  I DO have to prepare today for the visit of a friend who arrives tomorrow.  I give up my room as a chambre d'hôte.

Epiphany in the Calendar means the absolute end of those twelve days of 'stuff' when I increasingly refuse to join in, take part, and so my year needs to begin TODAY!  Carnaval will soon commence with the Mardi Gras!  

I will pick myself up and dust myself down until the day I can't and if people don't like me as I am then YES they can go elsewhere! It's sad but necessary!

I have lists of things to do and I even tried to formulate an ACTION PLAN for everything but that was JUST too OVERWHELMING. I am doing what I can in the Health department and in the other slices of that PIE chart! GOT TO!!!!!!! MOVE or DIE!!!

The twelfth of twelve

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love sang to me:

12 drummers drumming,

11 pipers piping,

10 lords-a-leaping,

9 ladies dancing,

8 maids-a-milking,

7 swans-a-swimming,

6 geese-a-laying,

5 golden rings,

4 calling birds,

3 French hens,

2 turtle doves,

and a partridge in a pear tree.

The eleventh of twelve

On the eleventh day of Christmas
Love came yesterday
in the form of a cheerful card from my son and his wife.

with two gifts which made me feel humble and tearful, knowing that despite all the difficulties we do love each other.  There have been too many years of hurt and pain ... Life isn't easy and the mouth soon opens when it is better to keep quiet!  I am hoping we can move to the future!
One gift is a jar of 100 capsules of "green lipped mussels" recommended by my son's wife for arthritis (they knew of my recent temporary lumbar paralysis).

One gift is delicious Chinese teaballs that open into a flower in the teapot ... just as in Wagamama's... mmmmm...
The best gift though was his simple touching sentence about hoping to catch up in 2016.
Ah... yes please.
However, I did phone just before New Years Eve. The post took 12 days to arrive!   Still, I would like us all to meet.  B has never been to France in 12 years to see where I live.  S has been but on each occasion was treated inappropriately and hurt by anger, thoughts of betrayal and my inability to be a go between.
I live in HOPE that we can be Family again!!!   That would be the best gift ever!

The tenth of twelve

On the tenth day of Christmas cat and chicken duties ended.
Oh...the liturgical calendar seems to have moved EPIPHANY from 6th to 3rd January...
This explains....
http://stpeterinchains.com/2015/12/epiphany/
and 
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biblical_Magi
explains further...
and with thanks to this link I reproduce a delightful image. I love the colours and composition.
 

The ninth of twelve

On the ninth day of Christmas..
my inner love says to me
that I love to write, take photos, walk once I've got my coat on and gathered motivation to get out and about, cycle (when weather becomes warm) and when muscles get used to the action.
Yesterday, eventually I became inspired upon a route and headed in that direction. I marvel at the fact that the woodland above L'Anglin has remained as it is for 100 years or more, yet constantly in its state of growth and decay!

Further en route, I discovered a different siting of a Borie, in excellent condition on a small chemin that I had never walked before. I like to find a new route.
See two previous postings for regional cabanes/bories/shepherds' huts :  one    and   two 

 The view looking out from the borie doorway:

Just around the corner of the lane , inaccessible to any roving wanderer, but more visible in winter, is the largest borie I know of in this region.  I suppose I have identified at least 12 in this area.

I had walked much further than intended. I'd been out for almost three hours.  I still couldn't find the chemins marked on the map but have clearly been eroded by agriculturists and the owners of woodland.  On the way home in the dusk with rain falling, the former miller of the watermill offered me a lift into the village.   I abandoned my 'dog defense tool', an acquired walking stick as I stepped into his new looking vehicle.

The eighth of twelve

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love wishes thee
"a marvellous future year with happiness, wealth and cheer, opportunity and chance to help you sing and dance."  TRULY, let it bring good or better health, fortune in not only a monetary sense, happy times with family and friends, opportunities to meet new people, go new places, experience new things, broaden horizons, safety and security.
Happy New Year!